The Devil & the Lord's Beatitudes

The Devil’s Beatitudes are displayed in black print.  

The Lord’s Beatitudes are displayed in red print.  (Matthew 5:3-11 NIV)

Blessed are those who are to tired, to busy, to distracted to spend an hour 

once a week with their fellow Christians — they are my best workers.

Blessed are the poor in spirit,  for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are the troublemakers — they shall be called my children.

 Blessed are those who mourn,  for they will be comforted.

Blessed are those who do not give there offering to carry on God’s work– for they are my helpers.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are the touchy who stop going to church — they are my missionaries.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,  for they will be filled.

Blessed are the complainers — I’m all ears to them.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.

Blessed is the church member who expects to be invited to his own  church 

for he is a part of the problem instead of the solution.

Blessed are the pure of heart,  for they will see God.

Blessed are those who gossip — for they shall cause strife and divisions that please me.

Blessed are the peacemakers,  for they will be called sons of God.

Blessed are those Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked — I can use them.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,  for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed is he who professes to love God but hates his brother and sister — for he shall be with me forever.

Blessed are those who are easily offended — for they will soon get angry and quit.

Blessed are you who, when you read this think it is about other  people and not yourself — I’ve got you too!

Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 

 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven. 

  Matthew 5:11-12 ( NIV)

Author Unknown